Inconceivable....

Weight Watchers Stats
Starting Weight: 303.2 lbs
Weigh in Weight: 191.2 lbs
Weight Variance: +3.0 lbs
Total Weight Loss: 112.0 lbs

That is right Wallace Shawn, Inconceivable!
I just do not get it.... I stepped on the scale today thinking it would go one way and it went the completely other way. Three fucking pounds?!?!?! I had to do a double take. I have NEVER had a weigh-in like this. And it wasn't just the scale at Weight Watchers I weighed in this morning and sure enough, BAM! three pounds in a day.

I just do not get it... We made a reasonable thanksgiving dinner (Chicken breast, a little stuffing, veggies and a light apple cobbler which I made) I worked out (Cardio class, running and walking) The only bad thing I ate this week was a poutine and ice cream cone at the fair. Nothing to warrant a 3 pound gain. Tuesday morning my weight was looking great on the scale 188.9, it looked like I was going to loose. (TMI) I had had a little digestive distress last night so I was nice and empty. I ate the same thing I always eat and drink on the Tuesday. Maybe I missed something this week, or maybe because I stopped taking my birth control, maybe someone slipped me a cup of salt while I was sleeping, or perhaps I didn't have enough veggies...

I have no fucking clue and I'm getting tired. Like that cry on your walk home from the bus and want to destroy stuff kind of tired. Like the why the fuck haven't I lost anything in 6 months kinda tired. The why am I working so hard for nothing kinda tired. I was all pumped this week. I started this loose 10 pounds for Christmas/Winter Solstice challenge and I thought I would make a dent in that. I was SOOOOO close to my lowest point loss, just one pound shy and now I'm right back up there again. It is frustrating and really testing my resolve.

Is this going to stop me? No
Am I fucking pissed? Yes
Am I going to let it get me down? Well maybe for a bit, can't help it... but I will get right back at it..... still sucks though.

Don't worry, I'm not going to give up, but its going to be hard to pick myself up from this one. I'm just bummed. I am going to try to take inspiration my all time Heroine role model from Kill Bill, Ms. Beatrix Kiddo, she didn't let a bullet to the head stop her, she woke up from that coma, killed a man and wiggled her god damn toe. If it was going to be easy then everybody would be thin.

Rule #1 Cardio

The gods were smiling on us this long weekend, what beautiful weather! I was able to go for many nice walks this weekend and enjoy the trees full with autumn leaves. I was also able to get together with my friend Christine yesterday morning for a run around the local high school track (DMCI represent). Normally we run at night and we were hoping for a cool morning breeze; however it was almost uncomfortably hot at 10:30 am with not wind whatsoever. (#firstworldproblems) However half of the track was covered in shade so we got relief on the home stretch. We make the commitment to run for 30 minutes and we only have to make a pit stop half way for water. The thing I am very proud of is that I kept up with her the entire time. *happy dance* Granted she wasn’t running her fastest because she was getting over a cold, but it was faster then I normally run. That last lap was a killer, I just kept yelling at myself in my head. "Come on!!!" "You can do it!!!" "Just one more lap!!!" "Do NOT give up now!!!". I think we ran around the track a total of 9 times which is around 3.5 kilometers. I would like to be able to run 5 kilometers eventually. It seems like a good goal, I am not sure if I want to do a race, but just get my body used to that amount of cardio… you know for when the zombie apocalypse occurs, I need to make sure I can out run them.

Steve Jobs Stanford Commencement Speech 2005

Leave you with something inspiring for the weekend.

Gym Peacocks AKA "Meathead"

Went to the McCaul Goodlife gym yesterday, it is become my favorite. I love the fact that they play Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Food network and Criminal Minds on the televisions in the cardio bays. I went for a nice 20 minutes run on the treadmill while watching a season 6 episode of Buffy. I am inspired by my friend Melissa, she runs for 30 minutes and I want to get back into that again. My friend Christine and I haven’t had a lot of opportunity to run at the school track for a long time due to inclement weather. After the treadmill I went to the free weight section and worked my upper body. I am always entertained by the “Meat Heads” who are really bulked up, who are grunting and flaunting their bodies like peacocks. I mean I have been to a gym in the village and I understood why those men were flaunting their bodies, but here it is more to prove their masculinity or their power. I can also tell who are the true Meat heads (the guys who work out every day) and the newbie’s who pick a random set of heavy free weights and sit on the bench trying to look really cool. Is this a guy thing? They all like to make this grunting sound which to me always makes me think of what they would sound like in bed. It would be nice if they were cute, but they are not. I look a little out of place when I work out in that section but I do not care. The weight machines upstairs take too long to cycle through and I can do my work out faster (at least the upper body workout) with a pair of 7.5 lbs and 10 lbs weights at my side. At the end of my workout I went to the pull up assist machine. I can currently do 7 chin ups/ pull ups at 110. I would like to be able to do 15 at 110 before I move over to 100. If you are unaware of how it works basically I have set it so that it carries 110 of my 188 pounds of my total weight. So really I am only carrying 78 lbs. If I move it to 100 lbs setting then I would be carrying 88 pounds. Understand? So eventually I would like to be able to do a pull up without any assistance. By doing this I will build my upper body strength and be working on the “hanging from the edge of a cliff” fitness goal.

Thanksgiving is coming!!!

Weight Watchers Stats
Starting Weight: 303.2 lbs
Weigh in Weight: 188.2 lbs
Weight Variance: -2.8 lbs
Total Weight Loss: 115.0 lbs

This is a holiday which makes many people who are trying to lose weight very nervous, but really it is great practice for the Christmas season. My sub leader Tracy went through a typical meal and it was in the mid 30 point range (Turkey, stuffing, gravy, potatoes, yams, cranberry sauce, beans, pumpkin pie etc…). So what are our options? Well do I really need all those carbs? I would be perfectly happy with just Turkey/Chicken, stuffing and green beans. I'm going to be making sutffing balls this year. Basically you take prepared stuffing, smoosh them into balls, cover them in a little low calorie margarine and then plop them into the oven to crisp up. It is a great way to preportion the stuffing. Also lets say I wanted pie, perhaps I could make my own low calorie version instead of store bought. Also in anticipation I could watch my food consumption earlier in the day and bank a couple activity points in anticipation for the large meal. The important thing is to track everything you eat and know that enjoying yourself doesn’t mean eating until you have to unbutton your pants.

Baby it's cold outside

Don’t get me wrong I love autumn; it is my favorite time of year. I love the leaves changing color, I love the slightly cooler temperature and I love the smell in the air. However this weekend was miserable, it was really cold and rainy. All I wanted to stay at home curl up under the blankets and watch a movie… which is what I did. I had ever ambition to work out at home or go for a walk around the block but it didn’t happen. Why? The weather really affects my mood and I have to fight to stay active in the winter time. Does this happen to you? In the spring and summer you get this joint of energy and then when the cold weather arrives all you want to hibernate? This is where setting a schedule is really important for me. I am going to have to pen it in as a non negotiable like my weight watcher meetings.

Heroine of the Week: Xena

I have decided to feature a few ladies who represent a strong fitness goal for me. She would be someone who is both psychically fit and sexy to boot. Today I think I will focus on Lucy Lawless as Xena, warrior princess. I used to love watching this show, partly I was drawn to the show for the pagan gods running amuck, and the other is because I loved the strong role model of Xena. She was a physically powerful lady in leather who got to kick ass every week and had both men and Gods knocking on her door. She fought with her body, a sword; a neat weapon called a Chakram, and could do flips in the air. I always liked that she was curvy too (strong legs and pronounced hips) and not rail thin. Also liked that she was kind a bitch at times too, or perhaps the word is tough. She sort of balanced the tough, sexy, nice thing perfectly. Aesthetically I can’t pull off the look (being a fair blonde and her having darker features) but with my body type I might be able to pull off the strong leg like her. Perhaps I will put the theme song on my playlist to help motivate me run that extra few minutes.